Wednesday, October 3, 2007

hoopnetting is not a crime


First off, let me say that I am speaking from a not completly informed point of view. After many attempts to call some Ventura Harbor Patrol Officers and get their comment on closing the lobster fishery along the ventura harbor breakwall, I was rebuffed and have yet to hear from them - officially. I can only imagine that that they are fearing for their lives, I can't say I blame them.

Unofficially, I believe a Harbor Patrol officer contacted me, and speaking on condition of ananimity, told me that he believes, and I quote - "Hoopnetting is not Crime". He believes that if this opinion gets out into the public he would be ridiculed at work, and even worse - tortured. I have heard they already put live lobsters in his locker. Oh the humanity.

As you may or may not be aware many people fed their families with those lobsters. Believe me, RUN DMC didn't pay for that hoopnetting outfit hanging drywall. He did it catching Lobzillas. Now hundreds if not thousands of people are going to starve to death because the Ventura Harbor Patrol thinks it is to difficult to control the traffic during the catch, and by the catch I mean the harvest of the langosta. This is adding insult to injury, right when the credit crunch hits us and the sub -prime mortgage industry takes a crap, now I gots to deal with the closure of the west coast's most abundant lobster fishery? How am I and the rest of my lobster catching friends supposed to pay our mortgages, if we have to go out and by lobster every night? How am I going to buy my Adidas Sweatsuitos? Answer me that - Mr. Harbor Patrolman.

I urge you to contact your local harbor patrol and ask them, if not for you than for the children, re-open the fishery!

Viva Langosta

5 comments:

Johnny GoFast said...

I agree. Hoopnetting is as much a crime as pedophilia or perhaps necrophilia. At one point I was way more into necrophilia, but the rotten bitch finally split on me. Any way, speaking on behalf of all the necrophiliacs turned pedophiles out there, for goodness sakes, open the lobster fishery. I'm writing a letter to my harbormaster as soon as I hang up on this blog. I'll leave the part about necrophilia out of my letter so as not to confuse the point.

Johnny GoFast said...

p.s. Now linked to my blog.

Anonymous said...

Jonas, Who the hell is johnny sprocket?

Anonymous said...

Lobster fishing is still legal, just a safety buffer has been incorporated. There is a great big ocean out there with many great lobster "honey-holes." I have heard there is a spot near the Ventura Point that once boasted the record for a hoopnetted linquista, 30 lbs! So head on out into that great wide ocean blue.

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